(Inter)national Hug Day

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Free Hugs, Place de la République, Paris

Was yesterday, we know. But we were busy hugging random strangers. In case you forgot to celebrate this important holiday we wanted to steer you to a couple of people who know more than a lot about practicing the vital art.

First, some words of advice from the American founder and creator of National Hugging Day TM, Kevin Zaborney, who told People Magazine he chose January 21 since it falls midway between Christmas and Valentine’s Day, a time when most of us “are at an emotional low.” Zaborney’s website sagely advises:

“While some encourage hugging everyone, National Hugging Day always suggests asking first. First published in Chase’s Annual Events in 1986, it has grown enormously in worldwide popularity leading many to suggest changing the name from ‘National’ to ‘International.'”

We’re going with the latter, since the French seem well aware of the holiday, which got nods in several dailies including Libération.

Last night I rang my friend Jérôme Calvini, a.k.a. the Free Hugs guy pictured here. While most people were dealing with the sub-zero temperatures by having their apéro under heat lamps, Jérôme could be found at Place de la République, commemorating IHD by doing what he does best.

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The self-described “love activist” also sent us a poem (translator/poets are welcome to try an English version) inspired by the ongoing Free Hugs experience:

Ma vie vous sera dévouée
Dévouée à vous aimer,
Dévouée à vous montrer,
Qu’une simple attention,
Sans aucune prétention,
Fait la différence,
Face à l’ignorance.
Je ne perds pas espoir,
De voir,
Un jour l’Humanité se réveiller.
De voir,
Un jour l’Humanité se relever,
De toute cette barbarie
Avec laquelle ils salissent nos patries.
Ce serment je vous le fais dès maintenant
Et le tiendrai sans relâchement, dès à présent.
Cette nuit de novembre ma tête a tenté de comprendre. Cette nuit de novembre ma tête a tenté d’apprendre.
Cette nuit de novembre ma tête a essayé de saisir. Cette nuit de novembre ma tête a essayé de dormir.
Cette nuit mon cœur a été meurtri,
Nos âmes sont endolories,
La même meurtrissure qu’au mois de janvier.
Par cette nouvelle attaque ils ont essayé,
Mais notre métissage,
Est plus fort que leurs adages.
Avec la même odeur de poudre.
Ils ont décidé d’en découdre,
Mais je ne peux m’y résoudre.
La même résonance,
La même consonance,
Ce sentiment m’a glacé le sang,
Un sentiment très angoissant.
Cette nuit on a tenté de saper notre amour.
Mais l’amour l’emportera, comme toujours.
Cette nuit j’ai senti ma famille s’effondrer,
Ma patrie s’évanouir, s’assombrir. Cette nuit ils ont espéré nous salir,
Mais n’ont réussi qu’à nous rapprocher
Cette nuit on a tenté de nous enlever notre père,
Cette nuit on a tenté de nous enlever notre joie,
Cette nuit ils ont mutilé notre mère.
Cette nuit ils nous ont mis aux abois
Qu’allons-nous devenir ?
A vos pinceaux,
A vos stylos,
A vos micros.
Tendez une épaule pour pleurer,
Offrez une oreille pour écouter,
Ouvrez vos bras pour serrer.
Ouvrez vos portes,
Que l’amour sorte,
Montrez aux gens,
(Si) simplement,
Que l’on s’entend.
L’amour est là,
Ne bougera pas,
Ne changera pas.
Qui a dit que la compassion était dépassée,
Ce front de solidarité que nous avons créé,
Doit continuer d’exister,
Ne doit jamais être abandonné.
Au détour d’une larme nous nous sommes croisés.
Au détour d’une larme nous nous sommes serrés.
Au détour d’une larme nous nous sommes aimés.
Au détour d’une larme nous avons senti,
Simplement ce qu’était l’humanité,
Alors que leur volonté était de nous séparer.
Résister à la haine nous avons réussi.
Soyez le changement que vous voulez voir surgir,
Et ça mes amis, sans en rougir.
Si un jour le ciel s’écroule,
Si un jour le bateau coule,
Nous aurons la résilience,
C’est ce qui fait la France.
Je vous aime

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(If you’d like one of  Jérôme’s hugs or want to help him out during the next Free Hugs session, just leave a message in the comments and we’ll put you in touch).

 

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‘Hugs against barbarism’

Like many Parisians, I had a hard time dragging myself out of bed in the aftermath of the November 13 terror attacks. After having been anchored to the desk at France 24 all afternoon and most of that Friday night while the horrific details emerged, I managed to fall asleep about 8 a.m. Saturday and spent that afternoon and evening hiding from the world, checking in with friends, gorging myself sick with news radio and internet updates. By Sunday afternoon, my dog and I needed to rejoin the world, and the sun came out to encourage us. I arranged to meet a friend and we started walking, not realizing until we’d crossed Bastille that our inner GPS was guiding us north to the Bataclan. Heading up Boulevard Richard Lenoir, we stopped to read the chalk inscriptions on the pavement not far from the Charlie Hebdo offices that were targeted by terrorists the previous January. It was reassuring to see so many people on the streets after 36 hours in which life as we knew it had come to a halt. Parisians were sad and subdued, yet children and dogs played along the asphalt normally occupied by the farmers’ market, which had been cancelled. The mood was a mixture of defiant, reflective and shaken.

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“Paris, back on your feet!” and “Paris, wake up!”

Moving north, we soon found ourselves milling about with hundreds of others who’d gathered quietly in front of the concert hall to pay their respects, lighting candles and leaving flowers, notes and letters for the 89 people who died there.

After stopping at dozens of makeshift memorials, at Wei and I wound up at Place de la République. Although public gatherings were forbidden under the state of emergency, we didn’t plan to stay long. I had been asked to file a story, but what more could I say? Like so many others, I was still in shock and after being outside for a couple of hours, wanted nothing more but to slink home and crawl under my couette.

Until I saw two young guys smiling and stretching their arms out to strangers near the Marianne statue at the center of the plaza. Jérôme Calvini, 26, a student at SciencesPo, told me that the idea came to him on Saturday morning after a sleepless night. “In these dark times, we need to give each other love and show that we’re united,” he said. “It’s kind of like, ‘hugs against barbarism’.”

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So that love triumphs

On Saturday November 14, Calvini started a hug circle in front of the Hôtel de Ville, but told me he preferred the symbolism of Sunday’s informal gathering at République: “I’m trying to show that we’re still alive, that life goes on.”

His friend Cédric Vergez, a banker, said he’d been so depressed he’d barely slept since he heard the bad news on Friday night. But then he got a call from his friend Jérôme. “Today I decided I’d rather act than give in to sadness and anger,” said Vergez. I’ve got to admit, being out here puts me in top form after everything that’s happened.”

As we were chatting, passers-by occasionally interrupted to request a hug from one or both of the men, and were rewarded with instant gratification. “I really needed that,” said one woman, smiling. Calvini hugged one man tight and kissed him on both cheeks, moving him to tears.

“Thank you,” he said, wiping his eyes before moving off into the crowd.

“The first 50 or so hugs, yesterday – I cried, too,” Calvini said. “I’m an emotional sponge and yesterday was just so heavy. But today, we’re laughing and crying at the same time.”

Vergez agreed. “I think this is what we have to do as a civil society – show that we are human, that we are love.”

Turning to provide a double hug to a couple who were tearing up, Calvini added: “And we have to show the terrorists that our difference is a facade.”

At the centre of the hug circle, it was easy to imagine that the world envisioned by John Lennon might just be possible.

Christine

[I ended up filing a more journalistic version of this story here. I plan to call Jérôme Calvini pretty soon to wish him a bonne année and see if I can get just one more hug for good measure.]